Monday, September 21, 2009

what a weekend

I almost lost the most amazing person in my life this weekend because 1. i suck at life and 2. i say horrible things when I get mad. I have a problem with saying things during arguments that I don't really mean. When I get all worked up during an argument I become overwhelmed with feelings that sometimes I don't even know what I am talking about. I will think back on some of the things I said and think to myself... really? was it necessary? and the answer is most of the time no. it was not necessary and I should learn that some of the things I say can really hurt people. I hurt someone that I care more than anyone in my life for and I regret everything I ever did or say to ever hurt him because honestly he is amazing. he cares so much for people around him and there are not many people like that in the world today. I realized it is time to grow up.. and stop saying things that are stupid and mean? It makes me so mad and now has caused me to have many panic/upset attacks that I don't know what else to do but... Blog..:D maybe this thing has something good for me? but I don't know. I wish I could take back things that I say but then if that happened we wouldn't learn from what happened. I really am not getting anywhere with this but it does help me get it out and relieve some stress. I have my first world regional geography map quiz on Tuesday and sadly enough I am a 3rd level nursing student that just so happened to have wore some nail polish and maybe ran 5 minutes late to clinical that ended up getting me kicked out of the university nursing program. how crazy is that? I now get to wait out a year and reapply next semester for the fall 2010 semester to start. leaving me to graduate may 2011. thank you UNA and have a wonderful day. I cant get over the nursing program but I guess it is going by the rules that some person had to make up one day. Oh well. I love geography and I am enjoying taking off from doing nursing processes, staying up all hours of the night during the week, learning drug cards, wiping ass, and studying 24/7 ..2 months for a test and then making a 82 or something like that. It is great being able to breathe and listen to an interesting teacher like my geography teacher and learn about things that will help our world. It is really sad, but guess what? i have no clue where anything is except for the US, Australia, and like 3 more places. and guess what? By Tuesday, I will know where every country is located. on a map. How about that? This class is great. we are able to study locations, information on the countries, cultures, and other fun things. I find it exciting to wake up for class and learn about that. Weird? yep.. i know. So far this semester is great. I am trying to pull up my grades and enjoy my classes that I will be paying for eventually one day. Nursing may not be my thing but guess what. I have came to far in that program that I will get through it and graduate and then go back for another degree. I cant give up because I really do care for people. Anyways, I have to go and get back to learning the world map. I can't wait to make my 100 and then go to Auburn for the weekend. Get me out of this town asap! Sorry for the babble.. have a wonderful sleep! :D

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